Venting So That I May Rest The Rest Of The Night Away

Sometimes life is just unfair. . .and then I think to myself, could this be what they call "karma". Once I read that karma is only for those who do not realize the affect their actions have on others, those who don't understand the repercussions. If you are mindful of what you are doing and who you're doing it to, then you don't have to worry about these types of things.

 I'll admit, over the last 5 months there are things I've done that I was not mindful of, and I am indeed facing the repercussions. All I want(ed) is to truly, genuinely be loved. I want to be connected spiritually to my mate, I want to share moments together that actually have value, but this seems impossible. Asking this of you means asking you to step out of your "mode" , as you call it. The period of your life where all that you focus on is making money to "make the lives of those around you better" too.

Alyssa Lau Tired of Talking
Honestly, yes money plays a large part in each and every one of our lives (UNFORTUNATELY) this society has made it that way. We are all working for ourselves or someone else to accumulate wealth, status and whatever else it is that you all desire. I just want to be connected to the infinite source from which life we came. There is nothing I desire more than to master this illusive state of being, because being to me means that I am no longer dependent upon this material world. The goal is to live how we should be, loving and caring for one another, being honest and open, being genuine in all actions, being true and free. We could all do some much better to contribute to global consciousness. 

Leonie Hanne Never Look Back

But tonight I am feeling indifferent. Indifferent about everything.. . because when I look around me I don't see the things that should be there, and I made it this way.
Yesterday I shared an article about the 5 stages of consciousness. I expressed that I was functioning at the Level III Vishen, Founder of MindValley, describes as the "Limitless State." In this state of being we decide that we are no longer living life for the reasons we were brought up to believe in. We create our own visions for our life and live it! We align our actions and intentions and manifest all we desire on this physical plane of existence. And I think to myself, "I can do that. I've done it for 4 years straight," just up until May of this year, I've been thrown off track entirely.

Karissa Marie Shades of Grey
Now I am focused on getting back to the limitless state. I have a vision, I have goals, I know how to align my actions and intentions (which I state everyday for affirmation). Is there anything missing?
I no longer look outside of myself for answers. I know that they are all within each and every one of us. And to think, I started writing this post because I was sad.

Upset that the person I am sharing a home with actually takes me for granted, believes that bringing me food everyday is enough to show they care. . . But I understand, these are the repercussions of the actions I've decided to take over the last  5 months. No being should live this way, so it's time to make a change.

I will get what I deserve out of a relationship. 
I am a dynamic being of light.
I will continue to focus and function at a higher level of existence.
I am more powerful than I could ever believe. 

Ruxandra Fatality


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